He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Randomize
