I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
