As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
