do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
