she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Randomize