he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
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