CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Alive.
So much puke
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
