Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
