Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
