I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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