what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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