i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
