I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
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