Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Randomize
