the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
