At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
