If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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