I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
