You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
