this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
My vagina is officially offended.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
