Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
