Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
