the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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