even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
