Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I'm sobbing to NWA
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
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