so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
