Have you finally orgasmed yet?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize