low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
