just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
