i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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