in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
