Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(804): View more from Virginia

i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry

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(228): View more from Mississippi

She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her

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(505): View more from New Mexico

I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation

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(276): View more from Virginia

I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.

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(716): View more from New York

Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom

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(303): View more from Colorado

I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?

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(+61): View more from Australia

I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.

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(901): View more from Tennessee

And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.

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(706): View more from Georgia

We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!

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