at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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