Small penises have feelings too.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
