My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
