Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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