there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
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