somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize