Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
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