Im at strip club and am horny
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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