Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
