So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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