Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I believe in your delicious
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
