So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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