I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
