he wants to bone in the snuggie
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Terrible idea I love it
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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