just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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