That's when you crack a 10am beer
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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