were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
