Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
